Friday, 9 October 2015

Leave

Pack up everything that belongs to you
And leave.
Don't leave me with keepsakes.
Just leave.

Gather the memories you left
In the crevices, corners, folds of my being.
Dust the places of me
you left parts of yourself in.
And leave.

Look for your favorite colour in my paintings
And your favorite songs in my playlist
And your movie recommendations in my browser history.
Extract them.
And leave.

Don't forget to pick up
Your books that line my over crowded shelves.
And planned birthday presents for every year till you turn
twenty four. 

Rip away the pages of my diary
That smoke with the ashes of your name.

Help yourself to the make believe world
I crafted for us.
But, remember, half of it
still belongs to me.
Leave me with mine.
Take yours.
Then, leave. 

You are free to share it
with somebody beautiful.

Let light illuminate the jagged edges
Of my broken pieces.
I don't need you to put me back together. 
Just take what is yours
And i will help myself.
Leave.

Take away the stories you told
The poetry you wrote
Take it all away, my wishes upon 
imaginary shooting stars
And single strands of eyelashes
And coins tossed into decrepit fountains-
What wish would they fulfill,
When they can't keep me from wishing?

Pack those wishes away in your luggage
So that I can trust myself to
Believe in promises, once more.
Then, leave.

I don't have enough space
In my closet, bedroom, slam book,
heart, soul and mind
To accommodate the two of us. 

I don't have the strength
To listen to unsaid words
Nor the intellect
To weave the threads of meaning around them.
Leave.

I don't need you to mess things up-
I am an expert at that, already.
I don't need advice, patience, practice, sighs
Love isn't a drug good enough
To cure me. 

Take all your love back.
Maybe someone will have use
For all your kindness.

Please.

Leave.